December 16, 2018
How many of us say ‘YES’ to a friend, work colleague or family member to do something knowing full well we don’t want to do it?
Who starts to change their thoughts and / or way of living to fit in or to please another person, knowing full well it is not them?
Who feels like their life is like driving to a destination and they have absolutely NO IDEA how they got there?
Well your not alone! Perhaps you have never thought of this?
I have learned through my personal and professional life that saying no to certain things is HARD.
I have learned our body’s will give us signs when something is NOT aligned to who you are!
I have learned the only way to get to your TRUE SELF is to stop with all the ‘BS’, sometimes fall down (or fall hard) and build yourself up! But really what am I talking about?
Lets say you start in a new relationship or a new job. You are clear on what attracts you to a person, seem comfortable in the relationship or seem to be fitting in quite well into the new role and organisation. You are accepted by your new partner and your work colleagues – all is going well. But are you really doing YOU in the relationship and in your role? I mean what have you altered within yourself to fit in? What have you stopped doing to please that other person or fit in to your new crowd?
What you may become to realise in time is that you may have only been speaking and doing certain things based on your new partners or organisations values. Conflict starts to show up in strange ways and you start to understand your personal values have been put aside to satisfy those of another person or organisation. Now this will continue until you realise after so many months or years that you have absolutely LOST yourself in the midst of your career or someone else’s expectations of you.
When I became a mother SPACE in my life was created . It became clear to me how I had been showing up in my career was no longer sustainable. I was achieving and working like a robot, with absolutely no alignment to who I was as a person – no creativity, a loss of heart felt intuition and an inability to let life flow! Not realising I had been running from a space of FEAR and on adrenaline. I felt numb and had totally forgotten what lit me up!
The first thing I did was look at my PERSONAL VALUES and this was when things started to change for me!
Once I understood my core values I went to work to find a career truely aligned to these values. I also went back to those hobbies I had neglected, those things which create calm in my life, settle my mood and feed my soul.
AUTHENTICITY, AMBITION, OPEN MINDEDNESS, POSITIVITY, SIMPLICITY, LEARNING & RESPECT are my core personal values.
No matter what stage of life you are at, I truely believe we must continually check in with ourselves to make sure we are LIVING according to our core personal VALUES. DOING YOU can only be achieved once you know EXACTLY who you are. This is when conflict in life reduces & you can overcome anything unexpected.